Women's League Day May 18, 2011

I would like to begin with a comment that was brought forward and which is so necessary to keep in mind:
"There were some excellent ideas of things we can and should do. However, we are sinners and come short in all our attempts. Therefore, it is of vital importance that we daily pray for guidance and strength to be of help to others."
This comment is so very true and as I attempt to answer a few more questions brought forward on this day, putting a few together, we must truly keep this in mind.

1. Making connections
a. Why are there those who don't feel safe in the church, or don't have a desire to be near His people? Is this always sin on the part of the person, or on the part of the church community, or both? Is it possible for someone to be "unattached" simply because of their makeup? Not because of some external trauma or event? Something to do with election (do I dare say that)?

One thing we have to remember is that we all have a makeup of being sinful people in rebellion against God. Don Matzat in "Christ Esteem", describes this very well in that our first inclination is always to rebel, we don't want to go to church, we don't want to be with His people. It is only God through His mercy and grace that brings us to the point that we do go to church, be with His people. That doesn't mean we are not responsible for our rebellious attitude and there are times when people will not come to God's church because they are not elect. However that doesn't let us off the hook so that we don't reach out to others. Sometimes it was our words that caused a sensitive person to feel unloved, or judged and they stop coming to church. We are responsible for our words just as the other person is responsible for their response.

b. So how do we convince someone that although they have been mistreated by the church or church members in the past that doesn't mean everyone will treat them the same? How can we connect with those members who constantly keep their distance? Often these are the same people who complain about not feeling welcome.

Trust has been broken, how do we gain it back? Please keep the 3 legs of the stool in mind: trust, emotional availability and sensitive response. Reach out to these hurting people, who have put up fences of protection, and be there for them. One step at a time: a visit over coffee to show you can be trusted not to talk about them behind their back, just accept what they have to say without trying to "fix-it" because that often feels like judgment. "Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God" Rom 15:7. Keep the 4 G's of Biblical Peacemaking in mind: Glorify God, Get the Log Out of your Own Eye, Go and Be Reconciled, and Gently Restore.
LISTEN!!